I have found, that the people that I consider to be the best dominants, the ones that I respect the most are all, very caring, giving and often times humble people. No need for grandstanding, chest beating, or trumpet blowing.
I feel that I am a dominant by nature, but that does not cause me to seek to be in charge of everything. I am currently in service to Master Doug Harris and I also own a slave. For me at least, its not all centered around the play or sex, its centered around the energy exchange and the spirituality.
Being a dominant and owning someone is the largest responsibility that I know of. It certainly requires me to continue to learn and grow, to push myself, before I can lead her. The often mentioned issue of safety is a big one, but it's one that exists well outside of the dungeon and bedroom. I must think of how she will be cared for, mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally, including to the point of setting up the frame work for her care should I die before she does. I expect myself to travel all those roads as far ahead of her as I can before I instruct her in how to walk them. Dominance to me, is not wielding a tool, that is an expression of it. Its not about demanding my way all the time, that's an indication of insecurity.
Its not about forcing my will on someone else, having that person come to me and want to submit to it is only a manifestation of it. Dominance to me, is about Service. Service to yourself, your submissive or slave and to your community at large, through making things better for each and every one of those things through the force of your will, without ever having to raise your voice, or your hand.
Dominance is about providing the focus so that others might meet your goals and theirs.
Justin Medlin
Now that I have your attention feel free to email me. I may or may not respond to the emails, but I promise to read all of them.