[21:00:54] SassySioux: i'm leading the chat this evening - CC is detained
[21:02:05] SassySioux: i hope more people show up
[21:02:14] stormy: <Enters the Dungeon>
[21:02:25] SassySioux: hi Sis
[21:02:35] lilypet: :) I know she called me, think there should be at least few more showing up
[21:02:40] stormy: Good evening
[21:03:01] gentle: <Enters the Dungeon>
[21:03:14] gentle: hello everyone!
[21:03:17] SassySioux: lily, Stormy is my adopted sister
[21:03:25] SassySioux: hi gentle
[21:03:49] gentle: brb....
[21:03:51] gentle: <Has left the Dungeon>
[21:04:07] stormy: Forgive me, sassy, I'm still trying to figure out how this all works. Hi sissy :)
[21:04:12] gentle: <Enters the Dungeon>
[21:04:20] lilypet: hiya stormy :)
[21:04:21] gentle: hello again.. *S*
[21:04:29] stormy: Hi gentle
[21:04:31] lilypet: wb gentle :)
[21:04:44] SassySioux: every five minutes or so, if you don't talk, just click on refresh so you don't auto log out
[21:04:51] lilypet: <just sitting here>
[21:04:53] stormy: Hi lilypet
[21:05:06] stormy: Thank you
[21:06:38] SassySioux: we will give it a couple more minutes to see if anyone else joins us
[21:07:37] SassySioux: tonight is going to be pretty much an open chat
[21:07:45] SassySioux: hopefully people will have some input
[21:09:25] lilypet: gentle, CC said I had to get you to tell the story of the first time you met her during the chat tonight *grins*
[21:10:00] gentle: *lol*... goodness
[21:10:05] SassySioux: oh, that sounds intriguing
[21:10:28] SassySioux: well, let's get this show going
[21:11:04] SassySioux: tonights topic is a mixed bag of taking online and club meetings to the point of relationships
[21:11:04] gentle: okay..... *S*
[21:11:28] SassySioux: how do you find out if this person is relationship or friend material?
[21:11:50] SassySioux: does anyone have any experience with this that they would like to share with us
[21:12:20] stormy: Ha! Only bad ones. :)
[21:12:37] SassySioux: could you share some of the things that made them bad?
[21:12:56] SassySioux: was there something that you did wrong that you learned from to never do again?
[21:13:40] SassySioux: what we are looking for here is experience that could help you and others not make some of these same mistakes
[21:13:53] stormy: Well let's see my Master that I was collared to for a year had lied to me and kept a very dirty little secret of a wife from me. I learned to check divorce papers from that one. :)
[21:14:34] SassySioux: do you think it is wise then to run a background check on a possible new partner?
[21:14:48] SassySioux: or does that step over an imaginary line of trust?
[21:14:50] gentle: I'm not quite sure what you mean stormy... check divorce papers?
[21:15:16] stormy: Actually you know what I have really learned from all of this and this I think is valuable to share.... have a mentor!!! Have someone else talk to the person you are interested see if their vibes about them agree with your own.
[21:15:27] SassySioux: gentle, divorce is part of the public records and can be checked out
[21:15:52] gentle: and marriage records can as well?
[21:15:53] SassySioux: good point stormy
[21:16:09] SassySioux: yes, gentle - these are public records and anyone has access to them
[21:16:19] SassySioux: takes a bit of searching, but it can be done
[21:16:23] lilypet: <just sitting here>
[21:16:50] stormy: You have to pay a fee t o have the research done but as long as you know the name of either the "groom" or the "bride" you can obtain the information.
[21:16:51] SassySioux: gentle and lily, how do you feel about a mentor talking to a potential partner?
[21:17:55] gentle: I think its a good idea. However, I would add that I think you should talk with your mentor... and be part of the decision making process.
[21:18:31] lilypet: I think a mentor talking to a potential partner is a great idea, provided that you have a mentor that you know and trust, use the same cautions when chosing a mentor that you would use when chosing a partner
[21:18:52] stormy: I agree with you gentle. sassy and her s/o are my mentors and we talk about everything!
[21:19:01] SassySioux: what are some of those cautions?
[21:20:14] lilypet: Well, first and foremost, don't rush, spend alot of time talking and getting to know anyone that you are considering as a potential partner or mentor, talk to other people that know them, do a little research, ask for references, find out what groups they belong to etc
[21:20:53] gentle: I was talking with some girlfriends.. the other day about meeting guys in general... and it seems once you get out of high school / college.... you are suddenly in the new arena.. where you may be meeting a lot of people... who you know very little about... and no one you know knows them either.... plus.. *g*.... you don't know how their experiences differ from yours.... they may have grown up in an entirely different hometown.... area.... etc....
[21:21:46] SassySioux: those are very valid concerns gentle
[21:21:56] lilypet: thats very true gentle
[21:22:20] SassySioux: and those differences could add a lot of flavor to a new relationship, or they could be potential downfalls
[21:22:25] stormy: What if the potential person doesn't belong to any groups or have any references?
[21:23:25] SassySioux: then i would suggest only public meetings until you got to know them better
[21:23:33] SassySioux: and then still take it slow
[21:24:20] SassySioux: does anyone have a checklist for new potential partners?
[21:24:20] stormy: May I ask another question?
[21:24:24] SassySioux: mental or written?
[21:24:30] SassySioux: sure stormy
[21:24:43] lilypet: Then I would ask what kind of exprience they have in the lifestyle and I would spend ALOT more time getting to know them before meeting in person,and of course meet in a public place, perhaps even bring a friend along for the first meeting or have someone calll you cell phone to check on you
[21:25:00] stormy: Do any of you or have any of you played with someone on a first meeting?
[21:25:35] SassySioux: i did once, and it was at a public dungeon, and the man had a national reputation
[21:25:37] lilypet: I have never played with anyone on a first or SECOND meeting
[21:25:41] gentle: I also would think.. if you are meeting someone brand new..... even if you are thinking yes, this person is a good match.... that it would be a great idea... for them to meet and interact with some of your friends too.... so you can get more viewpoints and feedback.
[21:25:54] SassySioux: my S/O was also with me at the time
[21:26:11] lilypet: good idea gentle
[21:26:27] SassySioux: i agree with you, gentle
[21:26:48] SassySioux: and if anyone ever needs a safe call, i will gladly give you my cell phone number
[21:27:40] lilypet: brb
[21:27:52] stormy: I played with someone on a first meeting one time, fortunately for me he was a very experienced dom that then sat me down and told me he'd kick my tail to next christmas if he ever head that I'd done it again and then explained to me how and why it was so dangerous.
[21:27:55] SassySioux: ok lily
[21:28:20] SassySioux: what were some of his cautions, stormy?
[21:29:10] stormy: He told me about safe calls, and told me to that if I ever do get to the point where I feel I can trust them enough to play with them NEVER EVER allow bondage on a first time play.
[21:29:38] SassySioux: and why is that?
[21:30:39] stormy: He said that if you are in bondage you are totally helpless and completely at their mercy. Since you've never played with them before you don't know their techniques and they don't know your body. If something goes wrong, you can't defend yourself at all.
[21:30:55] SassySioux: good points
[21:31:07] gentle: And... I think its also is a great idea... to put together a how-to plan about all this beforehand... and figure out what you will do when meeting potential partners. That way you can put together a good commonsense plan... before any emotions get involved.
[21:31:44] stormy: He suggested that for a bondage scene that it be done at a play party or with trusted friends in attendance until you KNOW you can trust them literally with your life.
[21:31:48] SassySioux: gentle, can you expound on this plan...what it would entail?
[21:32:06] SassySioux: that actually sounds like a great topic for the discussion board, btw
[21:32:28] gentle: *lol* I can try.... some of this is learned from talking with people and some through experience....
[21:33:31] SassySioux: experience is the greatest teacher
[21:34:39] lilypet: <just sitting here>
[21:35:16] SassySioux: how do you safely take a relationship from online to real life?
[21:35:18] gentle: This is off the top of my head.. *S*.... but safe calls, learning about them before hand... who do you know in common?, clubs in common?, meeting in public places, meeting the first time with a group of your friends there too and take it slow.. slow.
[21:36:13] CC: <Enters the Dungeon>
[21:36:37] CC: I'm hoping that better late then never is a good thing
[21:36:42] stormy: Those are great points, gentle.
[21:36:51] stormy: Hi CC
[21:37:04] SassySioux: gentle, do you think it would be a good idea for some of us with experience to put together a list of precautions for those who are new to the scene?
[21:37:18] SassySioux: and even as a reminder to those of us who have been around for a while?
[21:37:23] SassySioux: hi CC
[21:37:41] gentle: And communicate. Its tricky when you both think you are talking about the same thing... and think you have a good understanding only to find out later that yes you both agreed an apple is an apple.... but you find out later that one of you loves gala apples and the other tart granny smiths... in other words.. its not always simple.
[21:38:30] SassySioux: gentle, you hit on that magic word there - COMMUNICATION
[21:38:55] CC: speaking about being "around awhile" ... I think one can easily come up w/the attitude that .. hey I've been around .... everything has been fine ...it will continue to do so .. and little by little ones safety net and precautions can be put back in the closet
[21:39:34] SassySioux: exactly my point CC - we all need reminders, and in helping the newbies, we reinforce it in our own minds
[21:39:53] CC: *chuckles softly* I KNOW I am not near as through as I was the "first time"
[21:40:12] gentle: I do think that's a good idea Sassy... also though... I think one of the interesting things.. at least for me.... is to leverage that to the next level.... as in... this is what take it slow means .... so that it is not just a phrase....
[21:40:30] SassySioux: we as humans do have a tendency to become complacent at times
[21:40:36] CC: however ... there are still some things I DO ... every single person that I have met from the net ... one way or another ... I have had a safe call
[21:40:56] CC: at least until after I have had a "first face to face"
[21:40:57] SassySioux: excellent point gentle
[21:41:20] CC: my "vibes" have never really let me down ... in that they allowed me to put myself in physical danger
[21:41:24] SassySioux: CC, safe calls can be life savers
[21:41:45] SassySioux: one thing there is to make sure someone knows where you will be, and don't go anywhere else without letting them know
[21:41:52] CC: *grins wickedly*
[21:41:57] gentle: hiya CC.. *S*.... and are you going to share with everyone the first time we met?..
[21:42:20] CC: Sassy .. *soft chuckle* you know of course I even had one w/you two?
[21:42:24] stormy: I set up safe calls for a first meeting and the second. Then also for the first play time if it is private and not at a dungeon or a club.
[21:42:42] CC: awe gentle ... I thought we'd NEVER meet!
[21:43:17] CC: I just dont know why some people think I'm ... all that scary
[21:43:45] SassySioux: well, CC - i have met you face to face.......
[21:44:17] SassySioux: (wicked grin)
[21:44:44] CC: hmmm maybe that would explain the scary thing then eh Sassy?
[21:44:58] SassySioux: well, um.....
[21:45:01] SassySioux: er....
[21:45:30] SassySioux: actually, it was at a friend of CC's that we met
[21:45:49] SassySioux: and believe it or not, my daughter knew where we would be
[21:46:05] CC: I know that if I am doing an out of town meet .. I generally make the first call in front of the person I am with .. makes them aware that there is someone else to answer to or knows where I was ...
[21:47:01] SassySioux: do you meet in a public place, such as a restaurant?
[21:47:03] CC: if we had been meeting in a public place I would probably not have been as specific about calls .. though I do want someone to know where I was going .. and with whom
[21:47:43] CC: with Gentle .. it was at a wonderful store I loved ..
[21:48:13] CC: the Wish Fulfilling Tree ... w/a lil diner in the back
[21:48:15] gentle: Still wish there store were around....
[21:48:25] gentle: that store even.. *S*
[21:48:32] CC: I can still remember the PINK that gentle was wearing
[21:48:49] CC: *chuckles* or was that yellow? (which is a whole different story)
[21:48:52] gentle: *lol* and the chair you were sitting in.....
[21:49:40] lilypet: <Has left the Dungeon (autologout).>
[21:49:47] CC: was a wonderful place to meet a wonderful but very nervous gentle lady
[21:50:14] gentle: *smiles remembering*...
[21:50:35] CC: so I came late .... any "bad" or "iffy" stories get shared?
[21:50:59] CC: *chokes over here reading a p/m*
[21:51:12] gentle: A lot of what we are talking about.... the safe calls, meeting in groups, references ... in a lot of ways goes against the "polite" social interactions we all learn.
[21:51:25] SassySioux: sorry - was thinking about when we first met and the topic of conversation that evening
[21:52:06] CC: *lol* I think that sometimes people think that safecalls are only for submissives .. and they are, in my opinion, wrong
[21:52:24] SassySioux: CC - we were discussing earlier about putting together a list of potential questions and precautions for first and second meetings
[21:52:37] SassySioux: could actually make it a topic of discussion on the board
[21:52:58] CC: they are for human beings, regardless of lifestyle, orientation or relationship type one might be encountering
[21:53:11] CC: You can start one Sassy *S*
[21:53:20] stormy: Well I don't know about you ladies but the is something I request a potential to do now.... fax me a copy of their driver's license.
[21:53:42] SassySioux: yes - date rape is common in all walks of life
[21:53:54] stormy: I also ask what color, make of car they drive and when I arrive, I find the car and write down their license plate number.
[21:54:01] CC: stormy .. do you reciprocate as well w/a copy of your drivers license?
[21:54:19] stormy: No, Ma'am.
[21:54:26] stormy: This is a Dom meeting a submissive.
[21:54:36] stormy: I'm the female and the one at most risk.
[21:54:44] stormy: If they don't understand that, I don't meet them.
[21:54:48] CC: and have they asked?
[21:55:08] CC: so it is a male/female thing then?
[21:55:25] stormy: No, they have not asked, Ma'am.
[21:55:49] CC: Even as a dominant I have asked for a license ... on occassion .. though I admit I have never asked that from any woman that I was to meet
[21:56:03] stormy: Ma'am, most women, certainly not all are physically less strong then the male. Even if I were a Domme I would ask for their's and not reciprocate with mine.
[21:56:36] SassySioux: why is that, stormy?
[21:56:48] CC: However .. the longer you are in the lifestyle .. the more you can network and get references on "potentials" if they claim to have been around for some time
[21:57:49] stormy: sassy, for my protection. I don't want them having my home address. BUT, if they are going to kill me, I sure as heck want my safe person to have a copy of their driver's license. :)
[21:57:57] SassySioux: CC, one thing i have done is to direct them to the BRC and have them read my articles to get an idea of my viewpoints
[21:58:15] SassySioux: that makes sense, stormy
[21:58:45] CC: come to think of it .. *S* back to the lady in pink ... if I recall correctly .. she "rescheduled" our meeting SEVERAL times ...
[21:59:35] CC: IF something neferious had been afoot on my part ... I am pretty sure that I wouldnt have put up with that
[22:00:48] SassySioux: so, you think that is a point of protection a sub can use?
[22:01:01] gentle: (shy, shy, shy)
[22:01:03] SassySioux: reschedule the meeting?
[22:01:30] CC: I dont know about that .. it can be just "rude" .. on the other hand, as in so many cases ... it is case by case
[22:02:36] SassySioux: ah, you bring up another point CC - so many "doms" are rude to subs
[22:02:42] CC: In regards to net to face to fact ... I find that seldom(admitting it can happen) ... one can keep up a regular consistant line of b.s. for an extended period w/o getting found out
[22:03:06] SassySioux: if a person fails to show e respect as a human, then i want nothing to do with them
[22:03:51] SassySioux: are we speaking of "Danger Dom" here?
[22:04:14] CC: when I meet a submissive that says they want to be a slave to be used and abused ... well then I want to beat the hell out of them *S*
[22:04:32] CC: bdsm is NOT about abuse
[22:04:43] SassySioux: AMEN
[22:05:18] CC: and if they dont have that clear in their mind then they need an adjustment and I can PROMISE you I would not be playing with them or anything else for that matter except perhaps showing them the difference
[22:05:33] CC: it isnt so much WHAT is done ... but how and why etc
[22:05:54] CC: a spanking to a delighted sub is not the same as shaming a sub w/a public spanking
[22:06:07] CC: one that damages ones self worth
[22:06:21] CC: but then that takes us way off topic doesnt it
[22:06:29] CC: lets head back to Danger Dom ....
[22:06:48] SassySioux: i have met a few in my time
[22:06:54] CC: The many faces of Danger Dom .. regardless of gender .. though lets pick on the men tonight :)
[22:07:00] SassySioux: one in particular stands out
[22:07:45] SassySioux: CC, what do you think are the main characteristics of a Danger Dom?
[22:08:23] SassySioux: and gentle and stormy, feel free to share your ideas here as well
[22:08:28] stormy: How big are your titties???
[22:08:29] CC: Most often I have found them to be braggarts to a degree ...
[22:08:33] stormy: *laughs*
[22:08:43] CC: *lol* those are the more obvious ones *S*
[22:09:11] stormy: Any Dom who approaches me either on line or in real life in a sexual manner, RED FLAG.
[22:09:14] gentle: *huge roar of laughter*
[22:09:17] CC: they more often claim unsubstantiated feats which they cannot and do not offer to verify
[22:09:50] SassySioux: how about those that demand "online respect" such as capitals for them, demanding that you "bow" or "kneel" in their presence?
[22:10:33] stormy: I usually vomit on their shoes, apologize and then excuse myself from the conversation.
[22:10:36] CC: well ... those again to me seem to have a lack of reality orientation ...
[22:10:55] SassySioux: CC, how do you know you are thier main concern when the relationship is all online?
[22:11:18] CC: what I realllllllllly love is the 22 year old that claims to have 7 years of experience
[22:11:23] stormy: Someone who insists on playing at a first meeting, RED FLAG
[22:11:27] SassySioux: how do you know they aren't playing this same game with 20 others at the same time?
[22:11:29] CC: now wait ... that would be my youngest son
[22:11:44] CC: but in reality ... he would be one of the few
[22:11:52] SassySioux: lol
[22:12:05] CC: Sassy .. I think there is a barometer w/that ....
[22:12:36] SassySioux: i guess they are counting all those years they read John Norman's novels, or watched anime on TV, or snuck Dad's mags into the bathroom
[22:13:15] SassySioux: and what is that barometer?
[22:13:19] CC: IF one gives it time .. one will find an initial interest w/lots of time for you .. (lures one into play or suggestive relationships w/promises etc) .. then after the thirll is gone .. something comes up .. all of a sudden he or she isnt online near as much ...
[22:14:15] CC: IF one met someone on line chatting .. remember how you met ... and if you see something similar... listen to your radar
[22:15:00] CC: *chuckles* men tend to stick with what works for them .. and if they have a "tried and true" pickup line .. they are gonna keep using one form or another of it
[22:15:14] CC: being fair .. the same could be said for some women as well
[22:15:27] SassySioux: how about the cliams of education and accomplishments?
[22:15:35] stormy: I've seen a whole lot of women who are players on line too.
[22:15:39] CC: ask for verification
[22:15:50] CC: *G* I said I was being fair ...
[22:16:00] SassySioux: i knew one guy that claimed to be a couples counselor and psychologist
[22:16:13] SassySioux: come to find out he hadn't even finished high school
[22:16:27] stormy: *laughs loudly*
[22:16:38] CC: how much do you care if their boasts or credentials are valid
[22:16:43] SassySioux: yet he was advising people all over the world on how to better their relationships
[22:16:51] CC: how will it impact you if they are not true?
[22:17:16] SassySioux: if they can't be honest on line, then they won't be honest in real time
[22:17:29] SassySioux: and if they lie, then they can't be trusted
[22:17:39] SassySioux: that is the impact for me
[22:17:57] CC: but unless you are willing to ask the questions and feel it is your right to have the answers validated then you only have yourself to blame
[22:18:45] SassySioux: well, i do ask questions
[22:18:54] CC: One of the things I honestly like to get across to everybody again ... regardles of orientation ... is that you not only have the right but the obligation to be your own best advocate
[22:19:48] CC: only when you are sure of the cards dealt in your hand can you decide to draw or stay pat and play your hand
[22:20:01] Shockproof: <Enters the Dungeon>
[22:20:20] CC: I dont expect someone to hand over their checkbook and put me on their account ....
[22:20:39] CC: *grins* unless there is a deeper relationship afoot
[22:20:55] SassySioux: i agree with you
[22:20:57] CC: evening Shockproof .. have you ventured this way before?
[22:21:19] SassySioux: that is why i direct them to my articles here and see if they are interested with someone as opinionated as myself
[22:21:35] SassySioux: hi shockproof - welcome to Dungeon Chat
[22:21:59] Shockproof: once before
[22:22:10] stormy: sassy, the problem with that is...
[22:22:20] Shockproof: hello everyone
[22:22:27] CC: while it IS possible that I am not who I profess to be .. and that this website is constructed only for my vanity and getting submissive to fall at my feet .... *lol* NOT
[22:22:29] stormy: you get some that agree to everything and yet their actions say something totally different.
[22:22:41] CC: that would be way too expensive a way to get someone's attention
[22:22:54] CC: very good point stormy
[22:23:29] SassySioux: yes, this is true quite often
[22:23:41] CC: a very wise person told me one time ... "listen to the words of their mouth .. but watch their feet and see where they walk"
[22:23:53] SassySioux: but they soon start contradicting themselves, and that is where you start seeing the "danger"
[22:24:11] CC: warning warning Will Robinson!!!!
[22:24:21] SassySioux: CC, that is actually a Native American proverb
[22:24:31] CC: too often we do not listen to that "still small voice" ... and why is that ...
[22:24:43] CC: *whispers to Sassy w/a grin* I know that
[22:25:02] CC: why do we turn a deaf ear to our common sense?
[22:25:02] SassySioux: *blushes(
[22:25:27] SassySioux: Cc, possibly because we want to be loved, wanted, accepted, and adored?
[22:25:38] CC: *winks* I know somethings of the Red Road
[22:25:42] CC: exactly ...
[22:25:51] SassySioux: and will not heed the warnings out of need?
[22:26:12] CC: we want something or someone so much ... in our mind we create what we want ... or see only what we want to see with tunnel vision
[22:26:31] CC: "or hot pants of desire"
[22:26:39] SassySioux: and does Danger Dom portray himself out of the same need?
[22:27:00] CC: too often horemones take the place of intellectual reasoning
[22:27:12] SassySioux: is it a feeling of inadequacy that makes them try to be something online that they know they cannot be in person?
[22:27:34] SassySioux: hormones can be the downfall of many
[22:27:52] CC: depends on the Dom dont you think? For some it could be power ... others out of inferiority .. (yes there are self-styled Dom/mes that are insecure)
[22:28:42] SassySioux: so how do we educate others to recognize these danger dom/mes?
[22:29:09] gentle: <Has left the Dungeon (autologout).>
[22:29:13] SassySioux: how does one recognize a power play or a ploy to hide insecurities?
[22:29:15] CC: And there are still others with deeper issues .. perhaps hating women ... or men and using "power" to dish out in the "lifestyle" what they could not hope to "get away with" in a vanilla relationship
[22:29:24] CC: keep talking about it ....
[22:29:30] CC: everyone was new once ..
[22:30:08] CC: there will be many that fall .. there will be those that get up ... and those that climb a mountain ... bringing it up, talking about it ... personal worth, rights and responsiblities ...
[22:30:10] SassySioux: even those with years of experience can get fooled from time to time
[22:30:25] CC: we all learned from somebody ..
[22:30:55] SassySioux: and we are all still learning
[22:31:02] CC: and that can happen for several reasons too ... complacency, desire, past good experiences .. a trusting soul
[22:31:11] CC: I sure as heck hopeso
[22:31:11] gentle: <Enters the Dungeon.> Sassy.. I think you can do it two ways... one is as CC says.. to keep talking about it.... the other is to teach people how to develop a good plan.... one is proactive.. one is reactive... both I think have their place.
[22:31:45] SassySioux: then gentle, let's get a plan going
[22:31:54] SassySioux: we can use the message board to do so
[22:32:00] CC: to grow and survive we all evolve to an extent ... gentle is not the person I met years ago ... and for that matter I am not the same person that she met
[22:32:28] gentle: *grins* I have volunteered twice tonight haven't I?
[22:32:55] SassySioux: yes, you have, and i have volunteered to help you
[22:33:02] CC: I would really like to see some topics up on the board and get it back active again .. (this last hiatus has been too long)
[22:33:43] CC: I think perhaps if we did a buddy thing .. we could get it going ...
[22:34:00] CC: invite one person to the board and ask that person to bring a friend ...
[22:34:07] CC: a board chain letter if you will
[22:34:25] SassySioux: that sounds like a good idea
[22:34:35] CC: it has a lot of potential as a very topical, reality based forum
[22:34:41] SassySioux: i know there have been times when almost every message on there was from me
[22:35:08] SassySioux: i was starting to get paranoid
[22:35:32] Shockproof: <just sitting here>
[22:35:53] CC: *lol*
[22:35:59] CC: get paranoid but post!
[22:36:12] CC: eventually someone will break the silence ../
[22:36:20] Shockproof: <Has left the Dungeon>
[22:36:29] CC: still here Shockproof? thought we lost you
[22:36:32] CC: ooooooooooops
[22:36:36] SassySioux: perhaps we could get people to give input to what gentle and i start as a check-list and then compile it all
[22:37:05] CC: it is amazing to for me to see how many people come to read the articles and the discussion board but have no input
[22:37:30] stormy: <Has left the Dungeon (autologout).>
[22:37:30] SassySioux: fear of being outed, perhaps?
[22:37:33] stormy: <Enters the Dungeon.> May I share something that I did tonight to promote the site?
[22:37:44] CC: I popped into another site the other day and was amazed when several said that the BRC was one of their main reference tools
[22:37:57] CC: yes please
[22:38:13] SassySioux: i have it posted on a number of lists in the links section
[22:38:32] stormy: I was in a room that I always go to on Yahoo... a bbw submissives room...
[22:38:46] CC: *listens*
[22:38:55] stormy: Well I told them what was being planned here in June and asked them to all come join.
[22:39:09] SassySioux: super!
[22:40:10] SassySioux: as i stated earlier, i ask people to read my articles on here if they want to know more about "me", and tell them to check out other articles as well as the discussion board
[22:40:22] SassySioux: i usually get a comment later as to what a great site this is
[22:40:40] CC: stormy .. perhaps I can get you registered on the board ... *S* will "stormy" be okay with you??? and you could start a BBW topic that we can add to?
[22:41:04] CC: that way they could begin w/some input on the discussion board .. prior to "2nd Tuesday"
[22:41:05] stormy: Sure I would be happy to do that, Ma'am.
[22:42:12] CC: perhaps you could introduce yourself in the first post and what 2nd tuesdays will be about ... and get the ball rolling .. no pun intended
[22:42:33] stormy: Yes, Ma'am. It would be my pleasure.
[22:43:33] stormy: Ma'am, could you register me as stormyggirl?
[22:43:43] stormy: That is the name I use everywhere on the net.
[22:43:46] SassySioux: gentle, while they are getting that rolling, shall we start on our project by asking for input on safety in first meetings?
[22:45:06] CC: I feel like Ike and Tina Turner ...
[22:45:15] CC: rollin on the river ... rollin ... rollin
[22:45:17] SassySioux: why is that?
[22:45:30] stormy: Umm, thank you, Ma'am. I don't know how to respond privately.
[22:45:49] CC: ..... /msg CC whatever to whomever
[22:45:52] SassySioux: sis, it is /msg CC and then whatever you wish to say
[22:46:08] CC: w/o the .... first .. suggest a trial post firstst
[22:47:07] CC: okay .. the plot thickens
[22:47:38] CC: I can think of at least one person besides those of us here gathered ...to get to commit to growing the board
[22:47:54] CC: okay .. *S* a few more than one .. but I'll start small
[22:49:35] gentle: Y'all... I need to slip off to sleep.
[22:50:20] SassySioux: ok gentle - thanks for helping me out earlier
[22:50:37] CC: I totally understand gentle ... are you up to a movie this weekend? lets chat ...
[22:50:41] gentle: Sweet dreams... and Sassy it was my pleasure.
[22:51:01] stormy: /CC Ma'am, did you get my email about suggested weekly discussion topics?
[22:51:08] stormy: oops
[22:51:25] stormy: It was nice talking to you gentle, rest well. :)
[22:51:28] gentle: night everyone.. *S*
[22:51:32] gentle: <Has left the Dungeon>
[22:52:06] CC: I havent even opened my email ...
[22:52:13] CC: and that would depend on where you sent it
[22:52:17] CC: hmmmm
[22:52:46] CC: ............ /msg CC
[22:52:46] stormy: The editor one you gave me, Ma'am.
[22:52:46] CC: <just sitting here>
[22:52:48] SassySioux: CC, when will the transcript for tonight be on the board?
[22:53:00] CC: when did you send it stormy?
[22:53:07] stormy: The editor addresss you gave me, Ma'am.
[22:53:42] SubtleD: <Enters the Dungeon>
[22:53:46] CC: I'll have to see what miss lilypet is up to ..
[22:53:59] SubtleD: Good evening all
[22:54:00] SassySioux: she was here earlier
[22:54:08] SassySioux: hi Subtle
[22:54:28] CC: and what subject did you put on it and handle? I'm looking
[22:54:32] SubtleD: hello
[22:54:32] CC: evening there SubtleD
[22:54:45] stormy: Hello SubtleD
[22:55:25] SubtleD: smiles ..hi ..sits back to familiarize himeslf with the room
[22:55:44] SassySioux: SubtleD, is this your first time here?
[22:56:28] SubtleD: yes it is ..i have looked in before but there was never a soul here
[22:56:47] SassySioux: well, welcome to the BRC Dungeon Chat
[22:57:10] SassySioux: we have chats here on Tuesday evenings from 9 - 11 pm EDT
[22:57:14] SubtleD: I have come forme MasterDales community board and was linked to here..I find it /you very informative
[22:57:16] CC: I'm thinking it is not the ones that know if I want my cock bigger ... want to see teen girls ..etc
[22:57:24] SubtleD: Thank you kindly
[22:57:26] SassySioux: they are usually moderated and have a specific topic
[22:57:31] CC: SubtleD ... this is a Tuesday night topical chat
[22:57:38] SubtleD: tuesdays ok thanks
[22:58:02] CC: 9-11 pm eastern ...
[22:58:09] SassySioux: i am happy to hear that - we try to make it as informative and educational as possible
[22:58:17] CC: perhaps MasterDales community board might add that?
[22:58:17] CC: <just sitting here>
[22:58:19] SubtleD: I am a Moderator at MasterDales
[22:58:33] SubtleD: it too is a very good informative site/
[22:58:39] CC: oh how nice *S*
[22:58:52] SubtleD: what May I ask is your topic at the moment
[22:58:54] SassySioux: i will have to visit your site - could you give me a link, please?
[22:59:10] SassySioux: our topic tonight was safety in meetings
[22:59:12] CC: the way it works now is that 1 & 3 Tuesdays .. Robyn the Artic Bitch leads out ..
[22:59:31] CC: and 2 & 4th Tuesdays are mine ...
[22:59:35] SubtleD: one Mo please
[22:59:47] CC: in the past I have had guest presentors and am working back to that at this point
[22:59:51] SassySioux: sure
[23:00:08] SubtleD: http://masterdale.com
[23:00:21] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:00:23] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:00:56] SubtleD: I hope you enjoy //it is very user friendly and educational as this one sems to be
[23:01:18] CC: sassy has graciously accepted presenting a series on BBW's ...on "2nd Tuedays" for a few weeks
[23:01:29] SassySioux: thank you - i added it to my favorites list
[23:01:34] CC: always nice to find more educational sites
[23:01:40] SassySioux: i have?
[23:02:03] SassySioux: i thought it was Stormy that was doing that??????
[23:02:09] stormy: sassy has????
[23:02:12] SubtleD: safety in meetings?
[23:02:16] CC: ack *blushes*
[23:02:23] SassySioux: LOL
[23:02:24] stormy: sassy has never been a BBW in her life. *chuckles*
[23:02:34] SassySioux: whew/1 had me worried there for a minute
[23:02:48] CC: tonights topic was ... "Getting to know you" .. both sides .. subs and dominants
[23:03:09] SassySioux: yes, SubtleD - things to do to make sure you are safe when meeting someone for the first time
[23:03:13] stormy: As a matter of fact just yesterday I told her how jealous I was of how she looked in a blue jean mini skirt.
[23:03:32] SassySioux: and ways to tell when someone is not who they claim to be
[23:03:39] SubtleD: meaning diaologue between too before commitment??
[23:03:56] SubtleD: two rather
[23:03:58] SassySioux: among other things
[23:04:17] SubtleD: ok
[23:04:20] SubtleD: great
[23:04:22] SassySioux: we discussed safe calls, playing on a first meeting, danger signals
[23:04:23] CC: or even acquaintances
[23:04:49] SassySioux: gentle and i are starting a thread on the relationship board and asking for input from others
[23:05:04] CC: not every meeting has the end result as being a relationship, sceneing or sex
[23:05:07] SassySioux: we will then compile a list to be put on the board that people can use
[23:05:16] SubtleD: I ve always professed that a first meeting should only be that a meeting with much talk
[23:05:37] SubtleD: learning and studing each other
[23:06:04] SassySioux: SubleD, perhaps you could respond to our post with some of your own ideas, negotiation tactics, etc.
[23:06:33] SubtleD: on your bullitin board you mean?
[23:06:57] SassySioux: as subs, we are constantly on the lookout for ways of staying safe, but Doms have the same potential concerns as we do
[23:06:59] CC: would you like for me to register the handle you are using?
[23:07:03] SassySioux: yes, Sir
[23:07:07] CC: or perhaps another?
[23:07:38] SubtleD: please do//it is actually SubtleDom
[23:08:08] SubtleD: at Matser dales we have a long thread al about 1rst meetings and relationships
[23:08:33] SubtleD: I would love to ad My views on yours and learn as much as i can about your thoughts
[23:09:02] CC: and stormy .. no I did not get an email .. please resend one more time ..... editor@thebrc.net
[23:09:21] stormy: Yes Ma'am.
[23:10:14] SassySioux: Sir, what do you think about a check-list of sorts that could be used to help see potential problems or dangers?
[23:10:26] SubtleD: May I ask whom or who is the moderator here now?
[23:11:13] SassySioux: CC is the moderator, and i help her out from time to time
[23:11:51] SubtleD: smiles and greets again
[23:12:23] SassySioux: especially when she IMs me and says, "HELP"
[23:12:31] CC: this site has been a pet project of mine ...for nearly 5 years
[23:12:57] CC: there have been many .. *S* glances around that have contributed to it
[23:13:01] SubtleD: thanks /
[23:13:15] SassySioux: and you have done an excellent job with it too, CC
[23:13:31] SubtleD: 5yrs ?/ it seems to have a great format well thought out
[23:14:05] SubtleD: excuse my slowness as I get accustommed to the place
[23:14:17] CC: have actually been doing online education longer than that .. but the site has been up for 5 years
[23:14:22] SubtleD: yes I think there should be a checklist
[23:14:59] SassySioux: Sir, perhaps you could email me with some ideas that you think should be on the checklist?
[23:14:59] SubtleD: it should be a unwritten law to ask other any info about potential person
[23:15:01] CC: it is a free site so that it lacks some of the conveniences .. and for the most part the cost of the site has been mine alone
[23:15:25] SubtleD: must learn to read patterns on phone or meetings with others
[23:15:46] CC: dont know if you noticed but there is a very good checklist (lifestyle) on thee front page ... that is emailable
[23:15:54] SubtleD: well you have done well CC
[23:16:24] SassySioux: CC, i have used that checklist before and found it to be excellent
[23:16:27] SubtleD: by all means SassySioux
[23:16:50] CC: like I said .. it might have been my dream to provide quality lifestyle information .. but I could not have done it alone
[23:16:54] SubtleD: I will do better and copy and past the best ideas from MasterDales thread on it
[23:17:06] SassySioux: Sassy_Sioux2001@yahoo.com
[23:17:20] SubtleD: or you can visit it at your leisure//not trying at all to steal peoplae away from here
[23:17:36] SubtleD: copies email
[23:17:59] SubtleD: I meant I will paste the best from that thread on this board
[23:18:07] CC: I book marked it SubtleD ... and I will take a tour
[23:18:21] SubtleD: reads CC post
[23:18:26] CC: most of the people that come here you never see
[23:18:28] SubtleD: enjoy CC
[23:18:55] SubtleD: it gets very personall so many great thoughts appear and provoke others to post
[23:19:24] CC: I enjoy reality ...
[23:19:25] SassySioux: thank you Sir
[23:19:27] CC: well most of it
[23:20:11] SubtleD: I have found some very good threads here at BRC
[23:20:29] SubtleD: and started to visit nightly
[23:20:47] CC: please note there is now a search engine both for the main site as well as discussion board
[23:20:58] CC: nighly you would spend a good bit of time alone *S*
[23:21:35] SassySioux: CC, is that a hint to me to get back to my writing?
[23:21:44] SassySioux: and posting?
[23:21:55] CC: mark Tuesdays 9-11 eastern on your calendar and you will find us here .. sometimes small ... sometimes a larger group .. but always featuring r/t reflections
[23:22:01] CC: there you go Ms Sassy!
[23:22:40] SassySioux: yes, Ma'am - i will get busy!
[23:23:01] SubtleD: thanks you and if you don t mind I will bring some others with Me
[23:23:09] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:23:14] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:23:15] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:23:28] SassySioux: please do, Sir
[23:23:40] SubtleD: what is this (just sitting here) I keep seeing
[23:23:44] CC: and on that note .. and long over due ... I'll be heading out ..... please do SubtleD .. all are welcome as long as they bear in mind one thing
[23:23:51] SubtleD: is it Me idle?
[23:24:02] SubtleD: listens
[23:24:06] CC: that is that they have the right to disagree .. but NOT to be disagreeable
[23:24:12] SassySioux: when you click refresh, it keeps you from auto-logout, and that is the message you see
[23:24:20] SassySioux: also see it when you click on talk
[23:24:52] SassySioux: i must go as well - i am being summoned
[23:24:53] SubtleD: by all means........very well said //
[23:25:14] SassySioux: Sissy, we gotta go to bed hun
[23:25:24] SubtleD: good to meet both of you
[23:25:26] CC: anyone posting material /opinions that attack another .. will be moderated ...
[23:25:53] CC: the sign of "adults" is the right to convey differing ideas w/o raising tempers or their voice ...
[23:25:57] SassySioux: it was a real pleasure to meet you Sir
[23:26:03] CC: wonder if we could get that across to the politicians
[23:26:05] SassySioux: i look forward to talking with you again
[23:26:06] SubtleD: of course
[23:26:17] SubtleD: the pleasure was all Mine
[23:26:20] SassySioux: CC, there are hopes, and then there are pipedreams
[23:26:26] CC: ahh me too ... I HATE the a.m 5:30s!
[23:26:26] SassySioux: and that exceeds both
[23:27:15] SubtleD: excuse Me
[23:27:16] stormy: <Has left the Dungeon (autologout).>
[23:27:35] SubtleD: I have dial up where I have just moved to and get booted easily
[23:28:01] SubtleD: I am on the atlantic coast in Canada by the way
[23:28:10] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:28:12] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:28:14] SubtleD: <just sitting here>
[23:28:15] SassySioux: where are you located, Sir - generally speaking
[23:28:22] SassySioux: i am in the midwest
[23:28:28] CC: wrinkles my nose at sassy ... and stormy and heads to the door ...
[23:28:37] SassySioux: ah, never mind - i see now
[23:28:40] CC: oops .. you to there SubtleD
[23:28:41] SubtleD: again nice meeting you..and till the next time
[23:28:47] SassySioux: bye CC - talk to you tomorrow
[23:28:53] CC: Atlanta area ...
[23:29:03] CC: and lilypet is close to Toronto
[23:29:12] SubtleD: I am in Nova scotia Canada
[23:29:13] SassySioux: i'm in Columbus, OH
[23:29:20] SubtleD: east of the state of Maine
[23:29:42] SassySioux: i am familiar with it - would love to visit there sometime
[23:30:38] SassySioux: i must be off - please feel free to email me or IM me on yahoo messenger
[23:31:14] SubtleD: pls post your email one more time
[23:31:31] SassySioux: good night Sir - and thank you for joining us
